The Sob Story

So now I've really gone and done it. Last week, at Taekwondo, I was executing a side-kick with my right leg when the big toe of my left foot chose to stick to the mat beneath me while the rest of my foot rotated counter-clockwise. I heard and felt an ominous crack and swiftly sunk to the floor to inspect my delinquent appendage. All this occurred out of the sight of my instructor who then entered the gym with a look of puzzlement on his face regarding my strange situation. Of course we couldn't converse about what had happened, since neither of us speaks the same language, so we both just carried on as if nothing had. The centre of my left foot swelled slightly and adopted a mauve hue, but apart from a continual dull ache I really had nothing to complain about. Denial has always provided a swift remedy for many of my lesser ailments.

Today, however, as I was executing a turning face-kick, in full-view of my instructor, the baby toe of my right foot decided to take after it's uncle and stick to the mat as the rest of my foot twisted counter-clockwise in an effort to bring me full-circle. The result was an even more ominoius crack and another trip to the floor for Yours Truly. My instructor seemed embarrassed by this reaction and waited for me to ascend, but I was not so quick to rise or dismiss this potential second breakage. Don't get the impression that my Master is a heartless slave-driver: he's not. It's just that I often fall down (usually very awkwardly) when executing difficult kicks, and he has learned to ignore our collective embarrassment for my sake. After a moment he asked me if I was "all right" and I lied, of course, and said "yes"; so we continued our lesson (even though I came to the point of tears on several occasions). When he was though with me I biked home and went to work.

By the end of my second ESL class I was ready to admit I needed to see a doctor. My baby toe had doubled in size and turned a violent shade of violet and I was experiencing shooting pains that ascended my right leg every time I stepped down and which were affecting my concentration in-class. Fortunately I had a "break" (Ha!) in my schedule today, so my Boss and I walked over to the local clinic and got me in and out, with x-rays, a diagnosis, a splint and a prescription, in less than 40mins. Total Cost: 34,500 Won (~$40 CAD).

What I now know is that I didn't break anything in my left foot last week, but I did break a bone in my right foot today. I have to go back tomorrow to have a follow-up appointment, and possibly a more permanent cast. I don't think I'll be able to do my Black Belt testing next month, as I was supposed to do, unless I can bribe the doctor to give me a soft cast that I can put on and take off when I choose.

So my fate, for the time-being, is to remain sedentary: something I find very hard to do. I'm consoling myself with movies, but the English selection at our local video store is sadly slight. I am not asking for pity. More than anything I'm just annoyed at my stupid sticky toes and their crippling inclinations to act independently.